Dear friends. A film about the joy of attaching the stockings to my suspender belt.

Upskirt

Hi! I´m back. Sorry for not posting so much but the real world is very busy. 

Many cross dressers/sissys/transvestic fetishists or whatever you might wan´t to call us have experienced something that´s called purging. Well, that´s when one throws away items of underwear and tries to stop wearing that kind of underwear. My purge happened exactly four years ago this week. I got rid of my male underwear. I went into town, bought some nice boxes and put my boxer shorts in them. And then i took my knickers, stockings, tights, suspender belts, bras and other out from the cardboard box on the top shelf in the closet and put them in the drawers in my bedroom.

It felt so good knowing that ladies underwear was now the default option for me.  Four years now. It feels so good to choose a pair of nice knickers every morning, putting on a suspender belt and stockings and to know that i will do it again tomorrow. But as the autumn sets in up here in the north i have some times over the last weeks worn tights (for you Norte Americanos, that´s pantyhose). It´s always so fun to get used to wearing tights in the autumn. I like the warm and cosy feeling, and i always wear a pair of panties on top (i´ve written this before, i know). And it´s much quicker in the morning. I think most of you would agree that suspender belts are a lot more bother. Sexy and feminine, yes, and i love to be able to wear a suspender belt whenever i want.  So when colder weather comes in it´s always fun to start wearing tights after the summer. Besides, they make for very good upskirt pic and films. Which brings us to todays topic. I made a film featuring some recent shootings where i pull up my skirt. I hope you´ll enjoy watching as much as i enjoyed doing this. It´s the best thing in the world to be able to pose for the few of you in nice underwear and to transform myself into a pin-up girl.

 XXX, Lacey.

Pantyflash

Dear readers- Some of you have written to me and asked if this blog has been abandoned. No, but there is a big lack of time in my life right now.  And three and a half years ago when i started this blog things were so much more exciting. I was discovering a new world of pleasure and felt very happy to be able to share it with you.

Now there are fewer things to write about. There is a limit to how many posts featuring me in frilly knickers and suspender belt with texts about how wonderful it feels to have a dildo in my mouth that are interesting. And i´ve already written about how i enjoy to dress fully en femme when alone, and about starting to use makeup. I bet lots of my faithful readers would like to see me in makeup or riding a dildo, but that goes against two fundamentals i decided on when i started this blog, "No Nudity" and "Never Show My Face". There are 290 pictures of me already, on this blogg, you can check them all here

This week it´s been four years since i started wearing ladies underwear everyday and it feels so good.

I wish there was more to write about. Maybe i should try some fiction? Short sexy novels maybe about my sexual fantasies. But that would take ages to write. Or i could concentrate on better photos, but that would also take a lot of time.

But i sometimes gets a little time to make a film, and i get a real kick out of ut.

You know i get so excited by posing. I love being a sexy sissy, and i like that you see me dressed in my sexy underwear touching myself. In this film i give you a long long panty flash lying on the sofa. I hope you will enjoy it as much as i enjoyed the posing. 

Pretty in pink

It feels so good to be able to wear something so very feminine as pink kickers and nylons.

I really like to know that you will look at me in my stockings and suspender belt and get excited.

It´s exciting for me too. I hope you also wear some nice sexy underwear while you watch.

I love to pose. It makes me feel so sexy and feminine and submissive.

Total makeover

Well, i have crossed another line now.  I´ve spent the whole of last weekend wearing a skirt.
I bought this nice dogs tooth patterned skirt from M&S on sale. Cost just 15£.  And i have also been shopping the new Nylonica range from SHQ with lots of stockings in very feminine colors.

As i would be alone friday, saturday and sunday i planned well in advance. I filled up the refrigerator so there was no need to go out shopping, because i also planned on wearing makeup.
It was wonderful coming home on friday afternoon, choosing a bra and then stuffing it, then to proceed to the bathroom and apply eyeshade, powder, lipstick and mascara and then slip into the skirt and a pair of white court shoes and knowing that this was not going to end until sunday night.

As i had expected, doing the makeup was a little bit tricky but my skills got better during the weekend. I enjoyed the look of my made up face and really liked bettering up my lipstick. The feeling of the skirt and the different ways i had to adopt to move when wearing it was also very exciting.  I liked that i had to pull it down to not expose my stocking tops while sitting down and such. I also got much better at walking in high heeled shoes. On sunday afternoon i was posing for photos and filming me doing naughty things to myself when i could´t take the excitement any more.  I instantly felt that i needed to have something hard inside me, and lubed my dildo and stuck it in. It felt so great and i allowed myself to come for the first time since before christmas.  I soiled my suspender belt and my knickers and just lay for a long time, enjoying the wetness and licking my fingers.

XXX,
Lacey.

Merry Christmas

Bad Santa

I would like to wish you all a merry Christmas and a happy new year and take the opportunity to pose for you in my sexy red underwear. Thanks for letting me be so naughty...

All tied up at the moment

Hi, it´s me again. Your favorite cross dressing queer submissive pinup girl. Sorry for not posting for so long, but things are hectic. But i always find some time to play. And i´ve found myself some new very nice toys. In fact, i made one of the toys myself. I saw some very nice things in a shop and  got an idea. I purchased a necklace with a metal ring and a chain, and then i made this  piece of jewelry. The necklace goes over the hips, the chain goes between the buttocks and ring in front goes behind  the balls and penis. It´s a lovely item to wear under the panties. The feeling of the chain excites me. In fact, it´s nearly too exciting, i have twice soiled my panties just by wearing it. So i have to stop myself from wearing it for a full day.

The good thing is that the metal is easy to keep clean, i just wash it with soap and apply some disinfectant in the evening. But i would not advice anyone who is not completely shaved to try this. Even very short hairs get stuck in the chain, so i have to shave three or four times a week now.

I have also got myself some very useful patent leather ropes. I sometimes tie my knees together when i´m home and it feels so good to only be able to take very short steps. I also enjoy lying in bed tied up for hours when i have the time. And it also makes for exciting pics, you know how much i like to pose.

I made a litte film showing you my new toys. I must say that it makes feel so wonderfully slutty to know that you will watch me in this situation. 

XXX, Lacey

Two months...

I love saturdays. It´s the only day when i have the time to dress slowly and take some pics of myself in my lovely underwear. On weekdays i just attach my stockings  and run.

 New camisole from Marks & Spencer

My favourite knickers and suspender belt, Cleopatra.

Last month i wrote about chastity. I really enjoy it. I haven't had my hand inside my panties for two months now and i only allow myself come when i use my fingertips and two days ago i had an orgasm just by having a dildo inside me. It´s very fascinating to find so many new ways to get pleasure (well, new to me anyway).

I checked on some older notes, and discovered that tomorrow is my three years anniversary for shaving.
Today, i could not stand having hairy legs. It makes me feel so feminine to be hairless.

XXX,
Lacey

Chastity

As you already know, i have for some years been on a long and interesting journey to explore my sexual identity. And as i progress, things are getting even more interesting. During this time, getting sexual stimulation in a traditional male manner by masturbation has become less important. The need for, in lack of a nicer words, a quick wank, has given way to other forms of achieving pleasure. One is of course my exhibitionism*. Another can be called receiving. There is a very deep pleasure of licking and sucking a dildo for ten minutes. I found out that my tongue and lips are very strong erogeneous zones. Another thing was finding out that i enjoyed taking it up the rear. But pleasing myself in the ass is very different from what i ever experienced before. First of all, i have to be totally relaxed. Secondly, it takes a lot of time. And it can be a little messy afterwards, especially since a lot of lube is needed** Having a dildo inside is a very passive sexual activity. I have only experienced climax once while doing this, but it was highly enjoyable and i was not even hard. And i behave very different. I moan, breathe heavily and convulse. I give up control and give in to sexual extasy. I also quite enjoy just having the dildo between my thighs and buttocks, just enjoying the feeling.  And then i can also keep my panties on. 

 But as i said earlier, the actual orgasm is not that important anymore. I only ejaculate about once a week. I have tried to do without ejaculation for 14 days and it was quite fun. The important thing is not to allow oneself to put the hand inside the panties, and only use the fingertips for stroking. And like when i use a dildo the feeling is very different from what i experienced before. A deeper lust and a feeling of satisfaction even without having reached a climax. The excitement doesn't  stop suddenly, it slowly fades and stays in the background until it builds up again.

I have now stayed away from masturbation since the 8 of august. I still do all the other nice things, the only thing i will not do is to touch my penis in the conventional way. It's of course possible to achieve ejaculation just by stroking with the fingertips on the outside of the panties, and i have soiled my knickers and suspenderbelt a few times. But those orgasms tend to be longer, more like a wave than a burst and if i have the time i prefer to lie and enjoy the wetness and spread the sperm on my thighs and in my groin. I love to be wet.

I know that all these ingredients are usually seen as a part of a sissyfication process. Well, that makes no difference to me. I see them all as new ways to enjoy my sexuality. It's a real turn on to venture into a female sexual identity. The fact that i do this alone does not bother me. I think going this far would have taken much longer time if i had a partner even with a sympathethic one who dared to experiment.

By the way, i have been wanting a swimsuit for many years. One of the things that i really want to do is to go to a quiet lake and take a swim in a swimsuit. We'll, this summer i had the time and opportunity, but not the swimsuit. So i decided to take advantage of the late summer sales and get me one so I can be prepared for next summer. The swimsuit fits perfectly and the high cut legs show off my shave. Water is still warm...

XXX,

Lacey

Notes:

* posing, taking photos, editing pictures and then posting on the blog is very exciting but takes a lot of time. If i give myself quick satisfaction i cannot do the rest properly.

**if for no other reason, the sanitary pad in the panties is essential after i´ve fucked myself. A lot of lube trickles out afterwards.

For your pleasure

For this post i don't really have much to say. So i just decided to show you some of "pics of the day" from the last months.

I love the fabric in these panties. But they are a little bit low-cut and don't
have much control. The suspender belt is spanish brand Cleopatra, one of the best I've worn and i have several colors

 These burgundy colored knickers are an old favorite of mine. Together with a matching suspender belt they are really nice. To bad the black lace is ripped.

Quite a new purchase.  8-strap suspender belt and panties with black lace over red. So sexy to wear and to look at. And to touch!

Purple feels so feminine, especially together with white.  These are also very soft and stretchy and i like to feel them against my bum. Stockings look like Transparenze, but I'm not sure.

 These are very high cut and have a a lot of control with a see-through fabric in the back and lots of clever seams to shape the bum nicely. They also have double layers in the front, which i like very much. The stockings are Transparence Sara Logo, i really recommend those.

I love the red with black dots, the fabric, the lace bands and the cute bow. But these are really too low cut in the front. Stockings are Charnos 24-7, really nice.

These are very comfy to wear all day and together with a suspender belt from Cleopatra they look really good. Stockings are from Jonathan Ashton in a lovely color. Pity you can't see the black seams.

You know i have to show you at least one picture of my back in every post... My old old control body that still survives, together with a pair of full cut  knickers. I love to wear this outfit.

I don´t have that much to say right now, only that i have found the software to edit pictures, texts and blogposts on my iPad so i don't have to rely on my desktop Mac, which should give me the opportunity to be more productive. And i have also decided to play a little game with myself. For the next four weeks i will not put my hand inside my panties, only stroke on the outside with my fingertips or an open hand. I have tried this, and it gives a lot of pleasure, but in a very different, feminine way. I´ll let you know how it proceeds.

XXX,
Lacey.

Shame shame shame...

When i started this blog i was prepared to receive some abusive comments and hatemail, but the few comments i get tend to be positive and i only have to edit out the automated spamming that swamps every blogger. And the emails i get comes from likeminded persons who tell me about similar experiences. I'm very grateful for those mails. But last week i had an email from a person who wrote that i should be ashamed and that i was miserable. I of course replied that i didn't feel any shame and, no, i was not miserable. I quickly added the adress to my junkmaillist. The sender had earlier expressed his appreciation of this blog, so had either become struck with feelings of guilt, had his account hijacked or someone else had read his emails, been repulsed and sent me that abusive letter.
It doesn't matter. Like i stated earlier i can deal with that kind of behaviour. And since the subject is out, let me tell you why i won't feel ashamed. Like all persons i've done things that makes me feel ashamed. I've done stupid things and behaved badly many times in my life, hurt people i care about, regretted taking wrong decisions, treated people poorly who didn' t deserve it. Those things make me feel bad. But there is absolutely no way i can feel ashamed of accepting myself as i am and sharing my experiences of exploring deeper into the kind of sexual identity i have. My posing in lingerie hurts no one. Some could probably argue that i hurt myself by acting in an unnatural way or being in danger of burning in hell for eternity.

Well first i don't believe that there is a "natural" way of sexual behaviour. Sexuality and reproduction are two very different things and should not be confused. In fact, reproduction by male/female mating can be very pleasant, but i think sexuality is much bigger than reproduction (the Pope disagrees with me on this one). Every person has a different sexual identity. Most of the time it 's easy to broadly classify a sexual identity as hetero, homo, BDSM,TF, queer or such (some people can only accept hetero as being the correct way, but i have already dismissed those persons).

But when we start to look at the individuals inside these labels we find that there is a lot of differences. Take for example a straight male person who has had a lot of female partners during the years. if you can get him to tell about his experiences with girls the pattern starts to widen. He will tell you about one girl who enjoyed giving oral sex and another who only wanted to receive oral sex, another who always wore sexy underwear and another who never wore anything but plain cottonpanties but wanted to have sex constantly and in as many positions as possible. And if we take into consideration the homosexual community i know fags who would never be taken in the rear but love to put their penis in a mans arse, and those who grow moustaches and wear leather and female homosexuals who like to penetrate their girlfriends with plastic dildoes while wearing the most feminine attire. Let's not go in to the subject of BDSM, because there are so many variations i could not keep track of them ( but they really seem to be enjoying themselves). And for my own pet perversion, Transvestic Fetishism, the individual variations continue. Some like to snatch panties from their neighbours washingline, some claim they are straight, some claim they have a female sexual identity when dressed, some only go for the underwear but some enjoy full dress. For myself, posing in lingerie for you is an important part of my sexual identity

Nature duped us into reproduction by hijacking sexuality. As i said earlier, male / female reproduction can be a very nice experience. But it's not the whole picture of sexuality. Each sexual identity is different, and when we have a partner we seek out the different aspects of our sexuality that matches and enjoy them. It 's really like a trade. " you like this, i like that, we both enjoy that particular action, so let's fuck!"

I really can not come to another conclusion than that the variety of sexual identities are so common in humanity that variation is the natural thing.

And after dismissing the subject of there existing a natural way of sexuality i will adress the the subject of hurting anybody. Well, as i mentioned above some of the things that i regret most in my life is when i have hurt other people. But my lingerie doesn't hurt anybody. If you are a returning reader of this blog you will know how i have taken care of the issues of being exposed as a pantywearer when they have happened close to me. I would never use my sexuality to discomfort anyone. But this is a tight line to walk. While i demand acceptance for my own sexuality from those who know and ask them to judge me by my other actions i will not flaunt my sexual personality in their face. I like to be nice and respect other persons identity and to be treated the same. As long as no harm is done anyone can do whatever they want sexually in my opinion. One could argue that my sexual identity could be harmful to me because bigoted persons could inflict verbal or physical abuse on me. That´s true, but the problem lies with narrow-minded people, not with me so there is no reason to stop wearing. And i have no plans of traveling to Uganda.

Anyone who gets offended by the images or words on this blog could easily have avoided it by staying away.

On the other hand, if you have read this long you must be genuinely interested and not afraid of facing your own demons.

Thanks, i appreciate that you read but i sincerely think that like Playboy the real treat lies with the pictures, not the editorial content.

Sunny afternoon

As i have mentioned earlier, i seldom wear a bra. It´s too easily detected. But as i knew i would be alone most of the day and staying home and cleaning the house i decided to wear a bra. I also wore a camisole despite of the heat.. The bra straps and the underwiring felt so good against the skin and i loved it when i had to adjust the bra. It felt very feminine and exciting. In the afternoon i was done with my duties and had the time to relax and pose for a film. As always, i added some music, so lower the volume if you´re not completely alone.

XXX,

Lacey.

Reason to be careful..

By the way, always remember to log out! I had a lady friend in my house yesterday, and since she has been without a computer for a few weeks she wanted to catch up on some stuff on the internet while i was in the kitchen. She was checking some blogs and suddenly wondered why she was commenting as "Lacey"!

500 days

Today is day 500+1 since i stopped wearing mens underwear. It´s been a wonderful time and i´m happier than ever. In fact, being a sissy or tranvestic fetishist is now an important part of my identity and i could never suppress it again. I will continue to be discreet but i will never deny it if someone will confront me or if i´m found out. Putting on a pair of knickers every morning also makes one think about such things as gender, sexuality and genus. In urban western societies homosexuality is no longer seen as strange, but fetischism and crossdressing in various forms are still taboo. But society changes. 25 years ago it was still unthinkable for a talkshow host to be openly gay. Maybe, in a few years time Johnny Depp will admit that filming Ed Wood was very enjoyable because of the clothes he was wearing!

...it´s caught me in it´s spotlight...

(just click on the pic to see better!)

I´ve been caught again. Two days ago my son was about to leave for a visit to his sheepfarming mother on his christmas break, and his nanny Anita was packing for the journey. Everything was just fine, until Anita decided to pack one more pair of pajamas. They were hanging on the washingline in the bathroom, next to several pairs of my knickers and tights. I had hung the knickers in the last row, so i figured they were well hidden beyond longer garments and terrytowels but... to reach the pajamas she had to push all the washing aside and also lift two pairs of knickers that were on top of the washingline. Of course she noticed. I was all red when i realised what she had seen! And to make it all more clear, the week before i had washed two pairs of black lace knickers along with the rest of my washing and went to do some shopping, only to return and find them drying over the bathtub!
(Anita is instructed not to do any washing, that´s not in her work description. I do the washing and expect her and my son to fold his clothes and put them into the drawers, nothing more).
So now she knows. Like John, who found out late this summer. And she´s not stupid. Maybe i ought to tell her? She has a very professional approach to her job and i suspect she already knows about me wearing ladies underwear. But she is a young girl and lingerie could be seen as a sexual provocation, and i dont want that.

These people work for me and i have to care for their feelings. Maybe the best way to respect Anita´s feelings is to not mention anything and to continue hanging my knickers to dry on the washingline furthest to the wall and expect her to get a glimpse of them sometimes and then bring up the subject in three months time when we have a chat to discuss salary, work conditions, improvements and so on. I think that would be the most respectful way.

(just click on the pic to see my stockings better!)

But let´s change the subject. I have been checking up the subject of "Sissyboy" and " Forced feminity".
Nothing wrong with that except for one thing. Sure, we all love a little roleplay once or twice, a lot of guys seems to get off on the subject of being forced to wear ladies clothing and submitting to a "female role". As i said, that´s OK. But for me i could never take it as an humiliation to wear ladies underwear. Instead, it would be a punishment for me to wear Boxer shorts... and if i had to forgo the nylons it would be even worse because my legs would be cold.
No. These guys just want the enjoyment of wearing female garments and accepting a female sexual role and abandonment of a male sexual role, and to be able to do that they have to be "forced". Come on. I accept and respect that there are millons of diverse sexual identities and that sexual roleplay is one of the nicest thing you can engage in. Good. Why not just admit it?

Say, "why can´t I be a girl this evening"

instead of " ohh you force me to be a girl, it´s so exciting"?
Sorry, but it´s sexism. For a man to feel humiliated by wearing ladies clothing is an insult to women. I enjoy wearing womens underwear but i would never feel it degraded me as a male.
Wearing lingerie is fun. I love being girlish and no one has to force me to do it. My legs look good in stockings.
And come to think of it, ladies underwear is not only more nice to look at (different fabrics, patterns etc....) it´s also more comfy to wear. Knickers, tights and suspenderbelts feel better on your body than a pair of longjohns or boxers. I´ve known this for a long time, but the first time this was clear was when i was out shopping for a shooting jacket. I found a very nice tweed jacket in a shop that had the sign "equippers to the Royals" over their doors, but my attention quickly wandered to the "Made in the UK" all wool hunting stockings. Lovely, in many colours that go well with tweed. I purchased a pair that were Green/Light green. Overknee in male fashion terms, mid thigh if they had been for women. Worn with breeches they were just wonderful, except for one thing. They just kept sliding down. I had to get some electrial tape to keep them attached. A suspenderbelt woud have been the solution.., but i hadnt brought one for this occasion. So i was thinking about getting to the nearest gas station to some Silicone Glue to attach to the tops of my stockings to make them a pair of Hold Ups, which of course would have been an insult to this lovely and ancient firm of Stitchers...

Well, you get my point. With the simple addition of two items from womens lingerie (silicone stoppers or a suspenderbelt) these stockings would have performed so well. And silicone stoppers and supenderbelts are items of male sports clothing! Just ask any NHL-hockeyplayer or a keen cyclist.. They have been wearing sussies and holdups for years.

Guys are missing out on having comfortable underwear.
I think the first thing to do would be to introcuce an "uncrotched Long John" to the male public. Of course it needs some marketing bullshit like a scare that athletes with tight underwear will have a reduced rate of sperm production or such. Just take an ordinary pair of suspender tights in a more opaque fabric (80D) and call it " Crotch Friendly" and "Moisture wicking" and lots of men will wear it for training and enjoy it. Then all we have to do is to add a little lace...

PS. If you have seen any of my pics before, i´m sorry. I´ve made a mess of my picture collection.